Nelie McNeal, Founder and Managing Partner

One of the ways we cope with uncertainty is to plan, plan, plan. We fervently hope (or believe) that A + B will inevitably result in C. Take, for example, the hyper-competitive nursery school admissions process in New York City. A child’s placement, the theory goes, has implications for admission to prestigious private schools, then for a spot at a prestigious boarding school, and finally, for acceptance at a prestigious college. “If we get this early step right, we’re setting up a lifetime of opportunity for our child.” 

Does it really work this way? Superficially, maybe. But let’s take a closer look at that mindset, because it leaves out one crucial fact: life is not linear. 

At McNeal Sams College Consulting, we provide guidance with your educational planning. After all, that’s our job. We’ve got a semester-by-semester timeline and curriculum to prepare students for every aspect of the college choice experience, and we’re developing exciting new resources for ninth and tenth graders and their families. 

But we’ve been doing this a long time—some of us for decades! Given our work with hundreds of families, we see the risks of making assumptions about the future. Life presents countless transitions. Some are due to challenging circumstances: illness, layoffs, moving to a new city. Others result from opportunities: a class that nurtures a new academic passion, a chance meeting with someone in a profession you’d never considered, a conversation or connection that reveals different options. That immortal John Lennon lyric comes to mind: “Life is what happens to you while you’re busy making other plans.” 

Does all of this mean you should abandon a systematic approach to choosing a college, or saving for retirement, or maintaining your health? Of course not. What it does mean, however, is that developing flexibility and adaptability is the key to managing life’s twists and turns. We all need to leave room for the unexpected, whether it’s an unwelcome shift or an alternative path. Rather than limiting your thinking to the magic equation that will supposedly guarantee a perfect outcome, save enough energy for the infinite possibilities that could be.